Activism Featured Future Building Personal Growth Relationships

Allow room for allies to make mistakes — because we all make them

Replied to we will not cancel us by AdrienneAdrienne (

We hurt people.

Of course we did, we are human. We were traumatized/socialized away from interdependence. We learned to hide everything real, everything messy, weak, complex. We learned that fake shit hurts, but it’s acceptable…

Canceling is punishment, and punishment doesn’t stop the cycle of harm, not long term.

We will be accountable, rigorous in our accountability, all of us unlearning, all of us crawling towards dignity. We will learn to set and hold boundaries, communicate without manipulation, give and receive consent, ask for help, love our shadows without letting them rule our relationships…

Shaming and condemning mistakes simply makes others less willing to try or speak up, and less willing to admit their mistakes. This has a chilling effect to keep people in line with what the loudest have decided is right, even when there are valid arguments for other perspectives, and hardly encourages relationship building across identities and ideals. Righteousness is just as unhelpful from the liberal corner as it is from the conservative.

You can hold people accountable without being a dick about it. Not to tone police, but sometimes people on social media talk about others as if they aren’t a person too, and the intensity of condemnation feels greater than the sin. “Nice” is bullshit, but you can be kind and critical.

Mental Health Personal Growth

Saying No

Liked Volume 2, Issue 16: On Doing Hard Things by Patricia Elzie (Enthusiastic Encouragement & Dubious Advice)

One of my dad’s favorite things to say to me, ever since I was a kid, was this:

“Sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to do in order to get what you want.”

[S]ometimes the thing you have to do that you don’t want to do, is to say, “No.” Because saying no is what may truly set future You up for success.

I needed this pep talk today! It is so hard to listen to what you truly need, and honor that even when it means saying no to things that are hard to say no to.

Related, this quote, via Austin Kleon:

“We have to protect our minds and our bodies, and not just go out and do what the world wants us to do.”

— Simone Biles


Listened to Being Boss Podcast – Making a Business S1E2

Listened The Boundaries That Give You the Space to Grow | Making a Business from Being Boss

How to build boundaries for your work, creativity & life to ensure you’re making the most out of your time, energy & money as a product-based business owner

All about establishing boundaries (time, money, etc) when you are starting (and running) a business.

Like the thoughts about time blocking for business work to establish boundaries for how much you’re going to work on a project each week.